Sassy Says, Part III

She's been at it again, boy oh boy. Here are a few winners from the past few days:

Sassy and I have been having little potty power struggles the last few days. In short, I have to ask her 326 times to take her pull-up off in the morning and sit on the potty. The girl is just full of excuses. She has a million better things to do, a million other ideas... you name it. Once you finally get her to sit on the potty, it's like pulling teeth to get her to wash her hands. Crazy, I know. She is always telling me, "I don't haf to wash my hands"! I try to explain to her that we need to wash our hands every time we go potty, no matter what. It's the hygienic thing to do, after all. Well (gross statement to follow), now she tells me, "But I don't haf anything on them"! Yikes! How do I explain to her that if she actually has visible...er...material on her hands, then we need to be having an entirely different conversation. ***Throwing my hands in the air and harrumphing***

After she goes potty, she has the tendency to streak away like a screaming banshee... and I mean S-T-R-E-A-K... literally. Then, I have to proceed by chasing her around the house to coerce her to put her bottoms back on. God, I hope she doesn't pull this crap in preschool. Anyway, when I ask her to replace her panties, she typically looks at me like I have the intelligence of a single-celled organism and states, "I can't, mommy. They are inside and back," followed by the searing eye-roll that implies 'duh' and somehow stings so much more coming from your 2-year-old. Oh, by the way, "inside and back" is Sassy's way of saying inside out and backwards, in case you hadn't deduced...

Yesterday, Sassy was eating a snack. Now, I know better than to ask her to share her food. Does mommy share food with Sassy? All the time. Does Daddy share food with Sassy? Of course. Is Sassy typically willing to let us have a taste? Not so much. This hoarding of food concerns me on an entirely new level, but for now, I'll chalk it up to typical toddler behavior. So, anyway, yesterday Sassy asked me if I wanted a bite. "Sure," I replied, and Sassy gave me a cookie. Immediately, she asked if I wanted another, and I said, "OK," thoroughly impressed by her generosity at this point. Then, she tilts her little head and squints her eyes, and she tells me in her Sassy tone, "Finish what's in you mouth first, Mommy"! Can't argue with that...

This one has got to be my favorite. I was still not feeling 100% last night, so Ty took the girls to the grocery store with him. When they returned home, Sassy runs into my bedroom with a lemon under her chin, ready to show off her special "tweat". Weird, I know... Anyway, she points to her jacket and tells me, "This coat is so cute". "It is cute," I reply. "Everything you wear is cute. You are cute." "I'm not cute, mama," Sassy corrects me. "I'm vewy cute"! Here's to a healthy self-esteem!