The S'mores Meltdown Saga...

These events are based on a true story. Certain names, dates, and places may have been changed in order to protect the identity of the parties involved.

Once upon a time, there lived a group of friends that liked to host sporadic family gatherings for fun. One such get-together was held in a quiet town in Kansas, Memorial Day, 2009.

The scene was set- hamburgers and hot dogs were grilling away, salads were married, chips were torn open. The sand box was occupied by a curious 20 month-old who thought it best to shovel handfuls (yes, handfuls) of sand into her mouth. A few children frolicked in the sprinkler; some more children ran in circles with a multi-colored parachute, giggling with glee.

The men-folk tended to the meat, the ladies sipped iced tea and sunned their legs (I said based on a true story... not all events need be 100% true...) The sun casted magnificent shadows as it lowered slowly down the horizon, and everyone sat and ate a fabulous meal in honor of our fabulous country and the fabulous men and women who have allowed it to be what it is today.

As time passed, the children grew anxious for the coming event. One of the families in attendance brought all of the ingredients to make S'mores on the grill! The fathers and children skewered their marshmallows and began toasting, as the women continued to shoot the breeze and soak up the sun.

Moments later, one guest in attendance (a particularly striking guest, truth be told) noticed that her daughter stood, back facing her, and screamed in horror as her Daddy enjoyed a bite of his scrumptious S'more while she only watched. Dumb-founded, the woman sprang to her feet and scolded her husband for enjoying a S'more prior to sharing with his three-year-old daughter.

The man yelled in protest, "But, she already has one in her hand!" At that moment, the little girl turned around, tears rolling down her cheek, only to reveal that she did, indeed have an oozing, dripping S'more in her chubby little grip. "She wanted two," the father exclaimed, exasperated.

At this point, nothing could be done. It was too late. No amount of kind words, explanations, back rubs, tear wipes, or hugs and kisses could calm the little girl. She was spent- tired, sun-kissed, and crushed; knowing that she was only allowed one S'more. What parent would do that to their child??

So, the family in attendance had to pack their things prematurely and depart, for no one enjoyed hearing this little girl shriek hysterics for what seemed like hours.

So is the story of a quiet town in Kansas, a Memorial Day BBQ, a grief-stricken little girl, and a single melty, drippy, ooey-gooey S'more that never made it to the point of consumption. It was a sad, sad day.